Sunday night as I was coming downstairs, my sock slipped and I FELL down the stairs! I wasn't hurt terribly bad, but when I landed my heel hit the hardwood floor and I've been hobbling around ever since. I've not been able to put pressure on the foot, so exercising is definitely out of the question. My foot is feeling less terrible everyday, so I'm hoping by the end of the week I will be able to get back into Insanity. I've been watching what I eat, but without exercise I feel like I'm gaining. I'm not even thinking about stepping on the scale. I think I'm going to hold off for a few weeks until I've been back in the swing for a bit.
It's very frustrating to not be able to exercise, but I know if I do high impact moves on this foot then I may injure it worse than it is now. I've been at this for a long time, and along the way I've met a group of girls that are also struggling to lose weight. It's nice having the support of people that understand just how hard it is to get it off. Everyday I am thankful that I've found the strength of friends and the strength inside of myself to continue on this journey, no matter what obsticles I need to overcome.
On a side note, I've almost gotten rid of every piece of clothing that is too big. Keeping them around just means I may fit back into them one day, and I am not ever going to let that happen. My sister was kind enough to let me go shopping in her closet for all of the clothes that no longer fit her either, as she's lost weight and is a svelte size 5/6 now. I have lots of new beautiful clothes that I didn't have to pay for! Along with the clothes that fit me now, she gave me several things that are a size or two too small so I dedicated a closet in my house to my "goal clothes". Keeping clothes that are too small is fully acceptable, it gives me something to work toward.
I don't know at this point just how much weight I still need to lose. It could be 10 pounds, 20 pounds, or 30 pounds. I often wonder if when I get to the right weight I will realize it. Right now, I look in the mirror and still see a fat girl. Lets not kid, I am still fat. Not obese, but overweight. I hope that one day when I get to where I'm supposed to be, I'll be satisfied and happy with myself. That really doesn't have much to do with my physical self...I think I need to start working on my ability to recognize and accept that I'm beautiful (and NOT fat). It's been a long road....over a year, and I don't anticipate this road coming to an end anytime soon. This is my journey, as bumpy as its been, and as bumpy as it continues to be, I am looking forward to finally being completely happy with my physical self, regardless of how long it takes.
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