Sometimes in the afternoon while my son is napping, I have nothing better to do than watch Tyra. Usually, I can't stand to watch her show as she, in my opinion, is the absolute worse talk show host in history. Not that I don't like her, I watch America's Next Top Model and she is engaging, I just don't like her way of interviewing people. She has a tendency to turn every single subject into something about her. You could mention that you like to eat bugs and she'll have a story about when she was in Bangkok on one of her supermodel photo shoots she ate a grasshopper. You could be a one legged ninja, and she'd talk about this one time when she had a sleepover when she was seven and they tied her leg up and she had a sword fight with her girlfriends. Sometimes there is just stuff you can't relate to, and that's ok. A good interviewer doesn't try to put themselves in the place of the interviewee, they try to understand through a line of questioning. I don't think she gets that, but....I'm getting off track.
Last week a topic on her show was parents that walk around their houses naked in front of their children. To the right of Tyra was a line of women who thought it was completely normal, to the left a line of women who thought it was disgusting. They started with the women that thought it was fine and they cut to home video of one of the women. She was walking around her apartment completely naked. She was cooking naked (OH MY GOD) and she was sitting at the dinner table on the computer naked. Her daughter, who was around 7 or 8 was there. She and her daughter were walking down an imaginary catwalk naked. Her argument as to why she does it, "It gives my daughter self confidence. She will be comfortable with her body because I am comfortable with mine". Ummmm......I am all for teaching your daughter to be accepting of their bodies. To be aware of their bodies. But is it really necessary to be NAKED in order to teach these lessons?
I have a good friend who has no qualms about being naked in front of her kids. Do I think she's a bad mom? Nope. But I also don't think that she's a good mom simply because she's comfortable being naked. And she doesn't do it regularly or to make a stand against prudes or to teach her kids to love their bodies. She just doesn't mind if one of her kids sees her coming out of the shower. She doesn't freak out and grab a towel and run (like I would). This, I don't have a problem with. Intentionally being naked ALL THE TIME, sitting on your couch, cooking food and sitting where people eat, well that's just unsanitary!
I didn't grow up in a house where it was acceptable to be naked. You covered up. My mom locked the door when she went to the shower. I do the same. My kids have never seen me naked. Maybe its different because I have boys? I don't know, but I would never intentionally be naked in front of them. I don't want to scar them for life anyway!
I think that as parents we do lead by example, but there are some life lessons that don't need an example as detailed as the one this woman was giving to her child. You can be comfortable in your skin - with clothes on. You can teach your daughters to be confident - with clothes on. You can teach your kids to love themselves - with clothes on! I can only imagine how uncomfortable it must be for the kids subjected to their parents constant nakedness. Maybe not now since they're so young, but as they get older and see that this is not the "norm" in most households, it's going to get increasingly awkward for them.
By walking around in clothes you're teaching your kids modesty. And to me that is a trait you'd want your daughter (or son) to have. Just because you don't flaunt it doesn't mean you're not accepting of it. Just because you got it, doesn't mean everyone has to see it. That is a more important lesson in my opinion. You can teach your kids to be confident and love and respect themselves with words. And with actions such as wearing clothes and still being confident yourself.
- Some of you know me from my old blog "Moving to Morocco" where I wrote about meeting my husband and, you guessed it, moving to Morocco. Well, we're back now, and I want to write about other things (but yes, we're still happily married). There's no real subject to this blog. I just want to write. If you have a subject you'd like my opinion on, just let me know. I also plan on doing advice posts. If you have something you'd like an outside opinion on, e-mail me anonymously at firstname.lastname@example.org! Thanks for reading!